


Why Me?

by wutthequiznack (birbsandemidogs04)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Explicit Language, Gen, Klance if you squint, Let Pidge say fuck, Officially crack, i always wondered how allura would react to the puberty aspects of the human race, seeing how she reacted to kaltenecker's milking process
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 06:01:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15679446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/birbsandemidogs04/pseuds/wutthequiznack
Summary: Why Pidge?All she wanted to do was code. Why her?





	Why Me?

"Pidge," the princess's voice was right behind her, over her left shoulder. Katie didn't flinch. It had taken a while to get used to Allura and Coran's disruptions of privacy and frequent jump scares but she had, in the end, mastered the ability to appear unconcerned even when Allura did startle her.

"Yeah?" Katie replied, lost among codes flashing on her screen. It was a rare moment of downtime for the paladins, a rest after another day in space rallying to the cause against Zarkon whilst defeating miscellaneous enemies and robots sent by him. Katie was taking advantage of her break with the comfort of her tech, nothing mattering but the numbers and letters that flashed across her screen. Her concentration was on the screen alone.

"What is a period?"

Katie's eyelids rose like shutters. She turned from her computer with a desire to confirm what she'd just heard. "A what? A period?"

Allura nodded. There was a confused but hopefully naive expression on her face, one Katie knew a bit too well from the princess's constant requests for clarification on matters of Earth.

Katie swallowed slowly, contemplating her options. "Uhm, well, it depends on what sort of period you're talking about. There's the grammatical period, which is used to conclude a sentence."

Allura tilted her head. Her hands came to rest on her hips as she approached the green paladin for better visibility. "I do not think so,"

Katie was determined to eliminate all possible options before succumbing to the burden of having to explain _that_ to Allura.

She kept up the game until she couldn't anymore, and then thought to ask who the princess had heard the concept from. If she knew which paladin had said something of the like, she could probably determine the nature and context of the word.

"Well, I was conversing with Coran two quintants ago, and Lance walked past. He was mumbling."

Katie furrowed her brow. Her hands, pausing in midair above her virtual keyboard, curled into slight fists. Yep, she had her work cut out for her. "What was he mumbling about? Did you hear?"

"Something about Keith being like his sisters on a period?" Allura elaborated, rolling her hands reflexively as she spoke. "Is that some sort of ride? Or animal? And what does this have to do with Keith?"

Oh boy. Should she tell her?

"Erm, well, not exactly,"   
Fuck. She was telling her.   
Katie hadn't experienced the delight of having a period as she was still limited by the physical boundaries of boyhood, however she took female hormones and the one half of having a period, she could tell, was not fun.

Quiznack, was she going to have to have the talk with Allura?

She sighed, resigned, and bowed her head. "We've got a lot to talk about."

\--

Ten minutes later, Katie had summed up a brief and rushed menstrual cycle, its symptoms and causes. Mentally she was exhausted -- she had had to say the word "uterus" far more times than should be humanly possible, and her mind was stained a dark red. Appropriately, Allura's jaw had dropped midway through the explanation and was still lowered.

Katie didn't blame her.

"So does that help?" she asked warily, hoped the answer was yes.

In response, Allura gave a weak nod and squeaked a goodbye as she raced back out of the room.

Well, at least she knew what human women go through. Katie couldn't help but wonder how Altean fertility worked.

Damn, now she was never going to get it out of her brain.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Wow. So season 7 killed and buried me. The family feels had me crying happy tears and we got some real shippable Klance moments so I still believe... Even though there's all those DreamWorks rumours going around... Stay optimistic, guys. We can't know the full story until we get season 8. Who knows? Maybe they'll pull a korrasami. 
> 
> Also this fic is pure crack, honestly I did it to make myself laugh and I hope u guys enjoy it too in the wake of season 7. I might do another fic about the adashi wedding we all deserve or something about Acxa because that girl is for sure related to Keith, change my mind,,, what r u guys talking about straight Keith and even straight Acxa can't exist and I will not allow it to exist


End file.
